What people say about us !

A very creative idea.An interesting forum indeed.

Deepti Gupta

Cabinet reshuffle on cards

Cabinet reshuffle is expected to take place soon after the return of President Abdul Kalam from his foreign trip.Mssrs A K Antony,Ambika Soni,Moti Lal Vora and Jyotiraditya Scindia may get a berth.

N C Padhi is Secretary Security

N C Padhi will be new Secretary Security in the Government of India. He is 1968 batch IPS officer of Madhya Pradesh cadre.

Anil Garg joins MHA

Anil Garg has joined the Ministry of Home Affairs in the Government of India. He is 1994 batch IAS officer of Manipur-Tripura cadre.

Ghosh is MD of NRDC

Former Director General of Consultancy Development Centre (CDC), New Delhi, Somenath Ghosh, has taken over as Managing Director of National Research Development Corporation (NRDC), a Government of India Enterprise of the Department of Scientific & Industrial Research (DSIR), Ministry of Science and Technology.

Sunder Raman to join Settlement Commission

Sunder Raman is being appointed Member of the Settlement Commission. He is senior IRS (Customs) officer.

IAS changes in Orissa

R N Das has been appointed Director Technical Education. Srikant Paikray will now be MD of the OSFC. Alka Panda has been made Special Secretary Planning and Coordination. Chandrasekhar Kumar has been posted as Director Project, Panchayati Raj.

Black Label and ITDC !

In the Johnie Walker Black Label purchase case of ITDC, the CBI has officially registered a case. Meanwhile, the case has acquired a different tone after the supplier UDV gave Black Label bottles worth about Rs 2.7 crores free of cost to ITDC to cover ITDC's losses in the earlier purchase and has also agreed to cut its prices further. One senior bureaucrat in the Ministry of Tourism is likely to be under the cloud. Details are reportedly now available with the Cabinet Secretary.

Fate of ISS is worst than IDES !

Officers of Indian Supply Service feel that IDES is better than this service. Even after 29 years of Group A service they have not got JAG grade. Even vacant posts are not being filled up on flimsy grounds by the administration. Even,there is no cadre management.

Four posts of Chief Justices lying vacant

As many as four posts of Chief Justices- one each in Sikkim, Patna, Andhra Pradesh and Rajasthan - are lying vacant.

1984 batch IPS to be IGs in Bihar

Bihar Government has decided to promote 1984 batch IPS officers to the rank of IG this month.

327 IT Commissioners shifted

Transfer list of 327 Income-Tax Commissioners has been issued by the CBDT.

1989 batch IPS to be promoted in UP

1989 batch IPS officers are being promoted to the rank of DIG in Uttar Pradesh this month.

Where is Nandita Chatterjee ?

There were frantic enquiries about Nandita Chatterjee in the Department of Personnel. Present assignment of 1980 batch West Bengal cadre IAS officer Nandita with the WHO has expired on March 31. Is she getting another assignment ?.

Are these changes within the new transfer policy ?

Minister and the Secretary( Revenue) deserve all credit and applause for trying to implement the Transfer Policy to a considerable extent in its spirit if not in its letter. Altogether 71 Commissioners of Custom have been reshuffled through the official order 83\2005 dated May 31 by the CBEC. Whether the CBEC can justify these changes -done under the new transfer policy ?
At serial number 6 Mr. S.K.Sinha of the 1980 batch.
At serial number 10 Y G Parande of the 1975 batch
At serial number 49 Praveen Jain of the 1980 batch
At serial number 54 S K S Somvanshi
At serial number 65 Arun Tandon of the 1979 batch
At serial number 70 G R Meena of the 1984 batch
At serial number 71 Rajesh Dhingra of the 1975 batch
Praveen Mahajan of the 1976 batch

Who will be DG Forests ?

Who will be new DG of Forests in the Government of India? The tie is said to be between R S Katwal and J C Kala. The post has fallen vacant following the superannuating of N K Joshi on June

IAS, IPS in Chhattisgarh agitated

IAS and IPS officers in Chhattisgarh are agitated over the appointment of an IFS officer as the state's Home Secretary.

Rajasthan CM takes class of bureaucrats

Rajasthan CM, Ms. Vasundhara Raje, is these days, said to be utilizing her experience of the Ministry of Personnel, taking class of the IAS and the IPS.

IG for a day in Bihar

Bihar government has shown a rare gesture of appointing the retiring IPS as IG for a day. 1983 batch IPS officer Subodh Kumar Singh was retiring on May 31 and he was made IG the same day.

IPS changes in Chhattisgrh

Ravindra Bhendia will be new SP of Raigarh.Narendra Khare has been made SP Narainpur.P S Thakur has been moved to the PHQ as AIG.

First collector in Pondicherry

S Sundarvadivelu has been appointed first collector of newly formed district Karaikal in Pondicherry.

Reddy is Advocate-General of AP

Senior counsel C V Mohan Reddy has been appointed new Advocate General of Andhra Pradesh.He would replace D Sudershan Reddy.

Imaginary Interview
Laloo Yadav
I was sitting at home when the doorbell rang and I opened the door. Standing at my door were six burly men who looked every bit like goondas. They ordered me to accompany them and as I could not refuse I accompanied them. After a short drive I was driven into a bunglow that had Laloo's nameplate on the gate.

I was escorted to a room and made to sit on a chair and the goons were about to tie me to the chair when Laloo entered and stopped them saying, " Hudh……siraf laane ko bolaa tha…….third degree toh nahi kiyaa"??

Laloo : Abh aaya hai oont (camel) pahaad ke neeche…….abh teraa kya hogaa Bharat Kumar???
Me: Laloo Ji hope you do not plan to make dance like Basanti…….I know you are fond of laundaa naach???
Laloo: Bahut naa insaafi hai……..in your writings you cover me the most and when it came to doing interviews you chose Sonia, Manmohan and Vajpayee…….bahut naa insaafi hai!!!
Me: Seems you are very fond of Sholay…..I tried contacting you but was put on the merry go round….first I was told to contact your APS….. then one Gupta….then Subhash and then Sadhu!!!
Laloo: Chalo interview has been arranged…now start the interview!!!
Me: Laloo ji what is your version on the taint RJD has given UPA???
Laloo: Arre what taint shaint…..yeh koi painting ki class hai kya……..when Cabinet was to be formed Sonia Ji asked me to submit RJD names for Cabinet berths……I ordered the people I selected to get clean chits from Home Ministry and these were submitted to Sonia Ji….why even I got clean chit from HM!!!
Me: Who in the HM gave these clean chits???
Laloo: Don't try to be smart fellow or I will tell Sambha to start third degree……arre ask any Indian man and he will tell you HM is his wife……..Delhi waala HM does not know everything but ghar waali HM knows everything …..so whose clean chit has more meaning…….arre Rabdi ji gave me clean chit which I submitted to Sonia Ji????
Me: Didn't Sonia or Manmohan question these clean chits???
Laloo: Manmohan Ji and me have discussed this matter many times over garma garam chai and meeta meeta chocolate biscuits ( kindly read interview with Manmohan Singh as cross reference)…….. and he is very quite…..in fact he says that who is he to question clean chit…..with Sonia Ji I have discussed this matter threadbare…… to explain matters I took a revolutionary mathematical approach…… UPA minus RJD = No Sarkaar…….. RJD plus Commies = Power Lobby!!

Laloo is given his dose of Kheni by an aide and he puts it into his mouth and orders me to continue.

Me: Your saalas seemed to be involved in a lot of hanky panky!!!
Laloo: Arre I am very good Indian and I follow Indian customs…….in India it is custom to love Saalas….. Saari duniya ek taraf joroo ka bhai ek taraf……if I do not follow customs you all will say I am not following Indian customs…..like you call Sonia Ji gori you all will say I am a goraa!!!
Me: Now your Saala's chum Jha is the kingpin in the Bihar Flood Relief scam!!
Laloo: Arre bhai Jha and Sadhu are childhood friends………..but that does not mean Sadhu is involved in his nefarious activities….. Dawood Ibrahim had many childhood buddies in the chawls but the police is not suspecting his childhood friends or hounding them???
Me: Laloo Ji it is perceived that Rabdi Sarkaar and Sadhu are a part of this scam and have even shielded him!!!
Laloo: Kyaa anaap shanaap bakk rahe ho……. from Sadhu now you people are reaching Rabdi….and then it will be me….this is conspiracy against Yadavs……and we will take to the streets to protest this attack……also compared to Tsunami Relief Bihar Flood Relief is nothing……why don't you people investigate Tsunami Relief???
Me: Bill Clinton has just commended Tsunami Relief efforts !!
Laloo: Arre TIME commended Bihar Relief and even gave prize to that Gowswami fellow!!

Laloo picks up the spittoon and maros a pichkaari of saliva into the spittoon …..very nauseating sight !!! But his chamchas are happy with the pichkaari as if it is a burp that a baby has let out after drinking milk!!

Me: How do you manage the Commies…they are literally eating out of your hands???
Laloo: Manmohan Ji is using my trick and placating the Commies…whenever they make noise he calls them for lunch or dinner…..I do not wait for them to make any noise I call them over every now and then. Also they feel I am one of them because I identify myself with them…..Ganga gaye to Ganga Ram and Jamnna gaye toh Jamnua Das!! You know I have given quite a few of the Commies habit of eating kheni…this promotes bonding!!!!
Me: Do you invite them to your Launda Naach sessions!!
Laloo: What is wrong with Launda Naach…it is a cultural thing…..I am promoting culture!!! In fact I told Pawar Ji that in Maharashtra now there should be Dance Bars with Dance boys and I will send the boys……chi chi what you people have made this purely cultural thing into!!!

Seems the kheni has outlived its use and Laloo removes it from his mouth and throws it into the spittoon and wipes his hand on the upholstery of the chair he is seated on.

Me: You have nine children and you are promoting family planning!!!
Laloo: Who else would be more qualified to comment on this matter….I have experience on problems of large families.
Me: But this also means you do not walk the talk
Laloo: Arre lalloo children are not born by walking or talking…kya anaadi hai??? First you did not know about HM and now about how children are born…..shaadi nahi ki kyaa….single sawaari ho kyaa???

An aide brings in water and Laloo first gargles and then with his finger does an impromptu brushing exercise and then spits the water into the spittoon. The aide hands him a paan and he puts it into his mouth and wipes his hand with the aide's shirt.

Me: The fodder scam case is moving into a decisive phase??
Laloo: All these allegations are gobar……. arre do they have any proof that the cattle suffered because of lack of fodder…if cattle did not suffer then that means fodder reached the cattle…so what is the case??? I have photographs that show that during the alleged fodder scam period the cattle were absolutely healthy….risth pusht!!!
Me: Why did you suspend the Official who caught RJD men travelling ticket less??
Laloo: Arre he was not conversant with Railways……in Bihar purchasing a ticket is unheard of ..no tickets are available there!! Yes if they had produced a ticket he should have arrested them because tickets would have been counterfeit!!!

Rabdi comes in and is accompanied by a servant carrying tea in glasses and pakodas. Laloo introduces me to Rabdi and she gives me a dirty look and heaps my plate with green chilly pakodas and orders an aide to give it to me.

Me: What is your prediction for Bihar??
Laloo: Rabdi will be CM and Paswan ka bajje ga band
Me: Are you sure Paswan will not be kingmaker
Laloo: Wait for results ….will be joker of the pack!!
Me: If this does not happen
Laloo: Then I will revive old relations….you know I am Paswan's wife's mooh bolaa bhai …….Sonia didi will intervene and I will even speak to Amar jeeja ji….. Mrs. Amar Singh is my mooh boli sister!!!

I've literally been force fed a few of the chilly pakodas and my mouth is burning and I ask for water and Rabdi tells an aide to hand me a boiling hot coup of tea saying that it is sweet and will be an antidote for the chillies!!

Me: Laloo ji what is your equation with Buta
Laloo: 'Lovely' Buta is a 'Sweety'!!
Me: But Buta is working on an anti RJD plan!!!
Lalo: Arre babooa…..don't' forget where is Buta's khoota…10 Janpath. Have you heard the recent Bhojpuri song…Bhuta ka khoota???
Me: But if Buta orders Rabdi's eviction from CM House!!
Laloo: No problem……..with all my family and extended family I will shift to Raj Bhavan …….Sonia Ji will speak to Buta to let us all to be his house guests!!!! Buta will be happy to know that one of my cow's has just given birth to two calves and I have named them Lovely and Sweety!!!

My mouth is burning …head aching……third degree!!! I get up and Laloo gets up and escorts me to the door and orders his goons to take me home. He whispers to me that they may ask for tips and it is up to my 'shardaa' how much I tip them!!

Laloo: So Bharat will you continue writing about me ??
Me: Why do you want me to stop??
Laloo: No……this is what makes me thrive!!!

Just as I leave Laloo is ready to embark on another round of kheni. I take one look back as I walk out…. Laloo is seated with his goons surrounding him and his Moll is by his side…….looks like a scene from the Bhojpuri remake of Don!!!

Bharat Kumar

- Whispers --- Corporate World -

Chidambaram to meet Bankers

Finance Minister P Chidambaram is meeting the top Bankers in Delhi on Friday.

Gopalkrishnan to be ED of Corporation Bank

K Gopalkrishnan is being tipped to be new ED of the Corporation Bank. He is presently General Manager of the Union Bank.

Kohli to be ED of Dena Bank

U S Kohli is all set to join the Dena Bank as Executive Director in a couple of weeks. He is the brother of former Punjab National Bank CMD S K Kohli.

Bhattacharya is MD of SBI Bikaner

S. K. Bhattacharya has been appointed as the Managing Director of the State Bank of Bikaner and Jaipur. He would succeed K. R. Srikanthan who has retired.