‘Life Lessons'

 As people grow older, they typically accumulate more experience through years of learning, working, and living. With age one gains experience and it is of course not a prerequisite that one holds a big position or profile. It can be expressed more clearly by elderly men’s life lessons that they have learnt.  The best life lessons are rarely taught, but deeply felt through experience.

Here are some powerful ones people often learn over time - No one notices your pain, no one notices your tears, no one notices your sadness but all notice only mistakes.  Nobody is coming to save you, so get up, be your own hero; no matter how broke you are, learn not to accept offers that come with disrespect.  Do not trust anyone because people change anytime for any reason.  People will talk behind your back, do not worry they are behind for some reason.  Always be careful with your words, because you never know how many times it is repeating in someone’s head.  Half of your beauty comes from the way you speak and treat people.  Waking up every day is one of the greatest blessings we can receive; be humble and never think you are better than anyone else; we all leave this world with nothing.  No matter how kind or generous you are, you will never be able to satisfy an ungrateful person.  As one grows older, one realizes that peace of mind matters the most.  Life keeps moving; resisting change only brings pain. Learning to adapt builds resilience.  Everything passes, be it good or bad. Nothing lasts forever, so cherish the highs and endure the lows with patience.  There may be thousands of such life time experiences.

No matter what you do in life, people will always criticize you without fail.  For example, if you get fat, people think you eat too much; if you lose weight, people think you are sick; if you dress well, you are showing off; if you dress simple, you are poor; if you speak your mind, you are rude and if you don’t you are coward; if you are successful, you are arrogant and if you are struggling, you are lazy; if you are honest, you are naïve.

A story goes something like, once upon a time a village man was walking with his wife and a donkey crossing many villages enroute.  He crossed over one village and overheard people saying, ‘see, this person has a donkey and instead of making his wife sit on the donkey, he is making her walk’.  Hearing that, the village man made his wife sit on the donkey and himself walking.  He crossed over another village and overheard people saying, ‘see, this person is so uxorious and henpecked husband’.  Hearing that, the village man made his wife get off the donkey and himself sat on the donkey.  En route, the village man passed over another village and again he heard people uttering, ‘see, this selfish man, he is making his wife walk and himself riding on the donkey’.  Overhearing this, the village man made his wife also sit with him on the donkey.  Again as he passed over another village, he heard people gossiping, ‘see, how cruel and merciless this fellow is who is having no sympathy for the donkey’.  Hearing this, the village man got off and made his wife also get down from the donkey’s back.  Another village came and he again overheard people saying ‘see, this stupid person, he has a donkey even then both are walking instead of utilizing the donkey for travel’.  As may be seen, no matter what you do in life, people will never fail to criticize you.

Not everyone will understand or like you and that’s okay.  Seeking universal approval drains your authenticity.  So, be kind, not a people-pleaser and do whatever makes you happy, do whatever fulfills you and build your dream life one day at a time.

Subbiah Sridhar
Creative Freelancer & Former Indian Diplomat